My Obstacle Course

Getting around when you have MS can be challenging at times. I never realized how much I took walking for granted until my walking got slower and, occasionally, a little unsteady. These days, with my troubled gait and bothersome fatigue fighting against me, I often feel like getting around in everyday situations is like making my way through an obstacle course.

To keep the fatigue from walking to a minimum, I try to keep it simple, remembering that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. Still, there are those times when I have to change course when I'm walking, resulting in extra steps. There can be people or things that I have to go around when I am out and about. Little unexpected roadblocks. Just the other day, I had to walk around two parked bicycles that were blocking my path to the entrance of my local pharmacy. Sometimes I even have to walk around my cats, or step over them. They like to challenge me. I think it's their way of trying to keep me nimble.

Whenever I go somewhere new, I have to keep an eye out for steps, and scope out the parking situation to see how far I'll have to walk. Sometimes handicapped parking is not available, so I recently obtained a cane, which helps a bit with walking greater distances. I am mindful of curbs, or cracks in the pavement. Trip hazards. If I trip these days, I fall. I can't recover from a trip and regain my balance anymore. Another worry I have to contend with is winter travel. Walking through snow and over potentially slippery surfaces is always a concern. A little patch of ice and one wrong move, and down I'll go!



I try to look at getting around and performing daily tasks with my MS symptoms as an adventure. It isn't easy. Sometimes the obstacles I encounter can be frustrating. Maybe my arms get fatigued, and I find myself fighting with food packaging that's difficult to open, or dropping things repeatedly. Or I'm walking through a store, or wherever, and I feel like I just want to scream, "Everyone get out of my way!" But somehow, I get through it.



Life itself is sometimes an obstacle course. We make our way through it, bumping into this problem, or that dilemma. My own personal physical obstacle course has me dodging low energy here, having to take a longer walk there. Things that were once simple to do now require much more effort and attention to detail. Well, without obstacles, I guess life would be pretty boring.

August and Everything After

I decided to borrow the name of a Counting Crows album for this post because it seemed like a fitting title for it. As the month of August winds down and the end of summer draws near, my thoughts turn to the change that is in the air. The cooler days, the leaves turning color. I can already feel the autumn, the way you can sense that someone is standing behind you. I can recall how, as a child, at this time of year I would be anticipating the start of a new school year with a combination of nervousness and excitement.

Sure, it's a drag to have the summer fun end and to have to hunker down at school again, or to start getting ready for the inevitable onset of winter. Or maybe deal with times of uncertainty and feeling blue. But autumn is still a good time of the year.

While there are things to be missed (for now), the fall brings with it its own set of simple pleasures. The flowers may be gone, but they are replaced with the brilliant, colorful fall foliage unfolding and seeing the leaves drop from the trees, and drift slowly to the ground. Going barefoot outside gives way to hearing the crunch of leaves under your feet. I love that sound, as well as the swishing sound of the leaves being raked. And soon my cat will have a whole new pile of crisp, fragrant leaves in which to curl up and nap.

Things will change. It's inevitable. Maybe they will be good, maybe they will be rough. And then maybe they will get better.

Though sometimes we wish we could, we can't stop time from moving forward. Much as we may want to go back in life, to happier days or better times, we can't. We can try to fight it, we can cling to August with all our might, not wanting the summer to end, not wanting things to change. Grabbing every good moment we can and holding on to it for as long as we can.

But August has to end, and we have to move forward. There will be changes, and hopefully, there will be more good moments and happy days.

A Wish List for Life

It's an age-old, thought-provoking question - "If you could have one wish, what would it be?" Some might say a million dollars. A child might say a pony.

Of course, one wish is hard to pin down. Like a child making a list for Santa, one could easily fill a sheet of paper with a list of things one dreams of having.




A wish list should be more than just a list of what shiny new toys we'd like, however. At some point, it becomes more about making a wish list for life - a list of the things we'd like to do with the rest of our lives and the way we would like things to be. A list of "wishes" that, in some cases, we just might be able to make come true, without any help from a genie and a magic lamp, if we work hard enough at it.




A wish list can be more of a list of goals, of hopes and dreams we'd like to see realized, a sort of to-do list or motivational tool. Making a "wish list" for life means looking at what needs changing and what we'd like to work toward. A better job, a new house. A million dollars.




I wish I were debt-free. Financial security tops my wish list right now. Sure it is a practical thing, but it can lead to bigger and better things. That's one of my goals right now - to work on the financial situation. And there are still places I wish I could travel to. (Sigh), someday.




Of course there will always be those wishes we'll need a little help with, circumstances we can't bring about on our own. Such as world peace or a better government. There are things I wish I were physically able to do again - like running- that I can't make happen because of my health, but maybe someday that will change.



For some things, we just have to keep on wishing.